I recently came across a poster at a store, and it read:
Happiness is a Choice. Choose it!
Everybody wants to feel good. But why are so many unhappy people then? Is happiness only a theory? The thing is: Many people choose to be negative, not because they want to, but because they are unconsciously doing it.
Take your family members for example. You love them and want the best for them. So you try to counsel or talk to them on their bad habits, but your advice falls on deaf ears. They are not proactive enough (in your opinion) in taking the right steps. And when you become unhappy, you might be thinking, “But hey, I didn’t choose it. I am talking to them out of concern for them, but they think I am nagging.”
Here’s what I would do: When I find that someone is not receptive to what I am telling them, I will drop it.
Because…I choose happiness! Why continue to do something when you know you are not getting the results you want? Dropping it is not the same as giving up. I will revisit my strategy (in reaching out to the other party), as well as reflect upon my thoughts, feelings and behaviour. Then I will re-strategize on how to approach it differently the second time. Sometimes, I find that the timing is not ripe or I have done all I could at that particular point in time. But I reiterate, I do not give up.
You might think of it as walking away from the problem for a moment, and coming back to it at a later time. Just remember to come back to the issue again soon. I know of many people who have walked away from their problems and never came back again to try and solve it!
The next time you are frustrated because you seem to have hit a brick wall, try ‘dropping it’ and emotionally ‘walking away’ from it for a while. After all, you need to maintain your own sense of mental wellbeing so you can come back and re-solve your problems!
Stay well in the meantime, and see you soon,